We all have things about ourselves that we would like to change. We will tell ourselves that we really want to start eating healthier, it’s just that we can’t stop eating the junk food. We tell ourselves that we would love to follow our passion and build a business around it, but for some reason, we just can’t get started.
We tell ourselves that what we really want is to get up at 6 am, do some exercise and follow a morning routine but we just can’t seem to get out of bed when the alarm goes off.
This is what we do to ourselves. We focus on the struggle and we fall for a trick that allows us to make what appears justifiable reasons for our lack of results.
We believe that we are the sum of parts that are working in opposition. I want to do X, but I just can’t stop doing Y.
So when we say things like “I want to eat healthier, but I just love burgers and fries” who is the ‘I” that wants to eat healthily and who is the ‘I’ that wants to chomp down on a Big Mac?
Are there two of us in there and is the one who “can’t” is the most powerful of the two? No, of course not.
To try and combat this we think the answer is more willpower and to push harder against ourselves. It’s often said that what you focus on is what you get. By believing that the answer is to fight harder against ourselves, all we are doing is focusing on the perceived struggle. So that is what we get.
It’s not until we accept the truth that we can see the changes we want. The fact is we are already getting the results we want. We can con ourselves that there is a part of us that wants the outcome and a part that doesn’t but that is b.s. They are the same person. Our focus on the apparent struggle between the two lets us off the hook.
Wouldn’t it be better and kinder to ourselves to accept the truth that you are already getting the results you want?
The fact is you can have anything you want. It doesn’t have to be a struggle; you can produce any outcome you wish with effortless effort. You already are.
To break this self-defeating cycle of ‘I want but I can’t’ stop focusing on the struggle because it doesn’t exist. You are not struggling to create an outcome, you have already decided on one.
If something in your life is not currently how you truly wish it to be, then focus instead on the results you want to see. Add to that the intent to make them happen and your life can change far quicker than you imagine. It really is as simple as that.